Father Blather

Here is how it plays out during the cold season when you're a working parent. The following sequence of events is repeated over and over and over again until all viruses have cycled through your household.  First, kid gets sick. Kid stays home from daycare. You stay home from work to take care of sick kid. You fall behind in work. Kid gets better. Now you've caught the kid's illness and you're sick. You stay home from work, falling behind even more. You still have to take care of kid while being sick. Consequently, you may not rest and recover adequately. When you finally return to work you are too tired to work as efficiently as you need to catch up.  By the time you think you have stabilized your workload and you are no longer feeling physically or emotionally destroyed, guess what? Kid gets sick again and the cycle repeats. The last two cold seasons have been especially brutal. Parents, I seriously don't know how we're doing this. To make things worse, I feel...

If I could summarize what I've learned about life during these first four years of being a dad, it would be that love is such a small word for such a big, profound, and multidimensional thing. Cheez aside, the other significant lesson I've learned is the value of embracing chaos and uncertainty. By embrace, I really mean acceptance. I do not mean to intentionally create chaos or something. I mean to let go of the overwhelming desire to control situations and all outcomes. Bottom line is that Little Man has no interest in conforming to all of my expectations or needs, and I've learned to be ok with that. I won't lie though. The chaos and uncertainty have worn me down at times. The screaming at 2am, then 4am, then 5am... the tantrums at dinner, the food thrown on the floor... the poop blowouts, the perfectly-aimed golden showers... the car rides with demon boy  -- these experiences can not be endured without anguish. No degree of Buddhist enlightenment can shield you from...

What is colic? No, seriously, what is it? As far as I can tell, it is only defined as a symptom in absence of any other known cause. The symptom is that your baby screams at night on cue like an evil cuckoo clock. For hours. First question. Can colic really be "a thing" if it is only defined by its symptoms? You wouldn't go to a doctor to be diagnosed with runny nose or sore throat. The virus is "the thing" that you'd hope could be diagnosed. So what is "the thing" with colic? Second question. Whether or not it is "a thing", can anything be done to treat colic? Third question. If we haven't defined a cause and we're only talking about symptoms, then shouldn't treatment consider all of the effects? The mental health of the parents is severely affected by colic, so shouldn't treatment, therefore, encompass the well being of the whole family? My first son had colic. He screamed on cue every night, starting at around midnight,...

I am a Dad of two sons. My oldest is almost four and my youngest is a month old as of this writing. I'm tired. Becoming a Dad is a major life change. There is not very much that prepares us for the big life transition. In fact, becoming a new Dad actually results in biological changes . For me, it helped to talk to other Dads and read about other Dads' experiences. So that's what I'm going to do here. I'm going to share my Dad experiences.  I most definitely do not have it figured all out. If I'm certain of anything it's that there is no one-size-fits-all advice. Take or leave anything you find here as it suits you. Since the internet is full of lists already, what's the harm in adding one more? Here's my list of the Top 5 things I didn't expect when becoming a Dad. 1. You will forget who you used to be. I knew that the life changes would be huge. I knew that I would sacrifice a lot of the freedom I enjoyed pre-Dad. No more saying 'yes' t...